Pleasure is a necessary part of life. We are naturally designed to move toward pleasure and away from pain. Pleasure can lead us to what is good for us and allows us to open up and expand.
From this expansive place, our energy has the ability to flow freely and we are in harmony with life.
We experience pleasure through our five senses. We all have our own variations of what is pleasing to us. Some of my favorite sensory pleasures are music, the smell of jasmine, the feeling of grass underneath my feet, the taste of birthday cake and watching dance.
It is important that we each identify what our pleasures are and allow ourselves to explore them.
Sounds simple enough. But many of us…myself included, are challenged by this seemingly healthy inclination of allowing ourselves time and space for pleasure. What might get in the way of us allowing ourselves the pleasure to enjoy the world of the senses?
Most people would agree that it is important to take care of our needs for survival before taking the time to seek out pleasurable activities. This makes sense.
But in a culture that is always demanding more and more (beyond our needs), the time for relaxation and pleasure may escape us. We are trained to go, go, go…working as much as physically possible throughout the day…only to collapse when we are done.
If we take a break to relax or spend a few extra dollars on a nice lunch we may feel guilty. How can we indulge in pleasure when there is more work to be done and money to be saved??
AND often times we are moving so fast, we miss the pleasures that do surround us (eating too fast, looking at our phone when sitting on a park bench). It takes presence to fully indulge in pleasure.
When we don’t experience pleasure in our lives we feel depleted. This leads us to OVERindulge in things such as drinking, shopping, eating, or gambling to try to fulfill that need. But as most of us know…too much of anything (even chocolate cake) does not agree with our system.
We may even begin to rely on others for pleasure rather than being able to give it to ourselves.
It is important to understand what is happening here. We all have healthy primary pleasures, such as relaxing when we are tired, spending time in nature, treating ourselves to a nice meal or indulging in a good book. When we allow ourselves to meet our PRIMARY pleasures we feel SATISFIED, energized and more expansive.
However, when these primary pleasures are denied we turn to SECONDARY pleasures to unconsciously fill this need. Secondary pleasures are excessive, such as overeating, binge watching tv, drinking too much and overspending. These activities do not lead to satisfaction, they lead to us wanting more and more. This is called addiction.
No wonder pleasure gets stigmatized! We may have been trained to feel guilt when we indulge in life's pleasures as a way to protect us from this overindulgence. But this is counterintuitive because it is actually the denial of the simple pleasures that contributes to the overindulgence!
To find balance in the aspect of pleasure…AWARENESS is the key. When we tune in to our own needs, wants and pleasures we can make a conscious choice to fulfill them in a healthy way for ourselves, which is so important to our functioning.
When we allow ourselves simple pleasures we are going with the flow of life like the water element of the second chakra. We are meeting our own needs.
When we deny ourselves, it causes rigidity within our lives and our bodies, leading to an unhealthy desire to compensate and a reliance on others to give us what we desire.
Starting now, let us tune in to what is pleasurable to us and allow ourselves the chance to enjoy it! Let us take a deep breath and recognize what surrounds us through our five senses and find pleasure in the moment. EnJOY yourselves!!
